The Scars Behind Us
As I rummaged through that surgery album which had old photographs and memorabilia, I stumbled upon a collection of videos that transported me back to one of the worst seasons of my life - the time when I underwent brain surgery. It was a season marked by fear, uncertainty, and pain, but now, as I revisited those memories, I couldn't help but feel a sense of nostalgia and overwhelming gratitude for the journey I had traveled since then.
The videos began to play, and there I was, sitting in a sterile hospital room, my face marked with a mixture of apprehension and determination. The camera shook slightly as it captured the anxiety in my eyes before the surgery, and I could hear the tremor in my voice as I spoke about my fears and hopes same with the videos of those weeks after. I recalled the vulnerability I felt in those moments, as if I were teetering on the edge of an abyss, uncertain of what lay beyond.
As I watched those videos, I couldn't help but marvel at how far I had come since that time. The brain surgery had been a necessary but harrowing experience, one that required immense strength and resilience. It was a battle against a formidable adversary within my own body, and as I saw myself on the screen, I couldn't help but admire the courage I had summoned to face it head-on.
The memories of the surgery itself were still vivid in my mind - the sterile smell of the operating room, the hushed conversations of the medical team, and the moment when I had been wheeled into the cold, brightly lit space with over 15 medical personnel in a single room. It was a surreal experience, and yet, here I was, alive and well, watching the videos of my past self with a sense of awe.
As I continued to watch, I saw the gradual improvement in my condition in the following weeks and months. The videos captured my small victories - but they could never convey the mental struggle and the moments of frustration when progress seemed agonizingly slow. But they also captured the unwavering support of my family and friends, who stood by me through it all, providing the emotional scaffolding I needed to rebuild my life with the little miracle growing inside me.
What struck me the most was the transformation in my mental state. In those videos, I saw the early signs of hope and resilience emerging from the depths of despair. I spoke of my determination to not let the surgery define me, to use it as a catalyst for personal growth and change. Watching those videos, I realized that I had not only survived the ordeal but had also emerged stronger, both mentally and emotionally.
As I turned off the screen, I couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude. I was grateful for the skilled medical professionals who had saved my life and my baby, for the unwavering support of my loved ones, and for the strength and resilience I had discovered within myself. I had come through one of the worst seasons of my life, and while the scar remains, they were a testament to my ability to endure and overcome.
Nostalgia washed over me as I carefully stopped the video and switched the album of a challenging chapter in my life. I knew that I would never forget the fear and pain of that time, but I also knew that those memories would serve as a constant reminder of my capacity for growth, healing, and the profound gratitude I felt for the better place I now found myself in, both in terms of my health and my mental well-being.
Enough with the mushy and novela stories…. Let me tell you all about what I will be talking about this upcoming year of journals as I get back into it…. Faith, motherhood in all its true glory, fashion, design, and life!
If you haven’t already done so, be sure to sign up to the journal to receive it directly to your inbox once they are published! Stay along for the ride as I continue to rediscover myself and this life God has granted me.
“Behind every scar there is an untold story of survival.”
Currently …
Currently “Reading”
The Light We Carry: Overcoming in Uncertain Times
An absolute pleasure thus far. I came across this book after seeing the Netflix show with Oprah. I never thought I could relate so much to Michelle but this book has proven that we all have a little Michelle in us. I may not agree to all of her political decision but as a woman, mother, and wife, I absolutely LOVE her.
I would suggest you buy this book and maybe get it for some of you friends and family!
Currently “Watching”
New Amsterdam
Ugh! This has become my nightly view. I should probably spend that time working out or something but for now, it makes me feel good and entertained.
Plot: A new medical director breaks the rules to heal the system at America's oldest public hospital.
“How can I help?”
Currently on my “Wish List”
VALENTINO GARAVANI | VLOGO 40 embellished leather-trimmed flocked canvas slingback pumps via Net-a-Porter
GUCCI | Baby horsebit-detailed leather slingback pumps via Net-a-Porter
Currently “Loving”
Jon Louis Art! My husband and I went to Art Basel last week and we bumped into some art pieces that really speak to us. As many may know, our family is obsessed with anything space, Star Wars, fashion, and cars. Well, Jon Louis art is literally what we both would love to buy and have displayed all over our house. He is such a talented artist from Miami.
Photo taken from iPhone. Visit Jon Louis website HERE.
Refreshing.Rejuvenating.Romantic. Reconnection.Relaxation.
Last weekend, with the kids in the capable hands of their grandparents, my spouse and I relished the rare opportunity to reclaim our identity as a couple. Free from the usual parental juggling act, we began with a leisurely breakfast, savoring the quiet moments and uninterrupted conversation that had become a luxury. We explored art galleries, indulged in a spontaneous tattoo session, and dined at various places, reveling in the freedom to be ourselves again. The weekend served as a poignant reminder of the importance of carving out time for each other amid the beautiful chaos of family life, rekindling the spark that first brought us together.
As the weekend came to a close, we returned home with rejuvenated spirits, cherishing the memories of a weekend filled with laughter, art, and the simple joy of being a couple. The tattoos we now share stand as a permanent reminder of that special time, a symbol of the bond that persists through the challenges and joys of parenthood, and a promise to continue nurturing our relationship amidst the demands of family life.
